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But I feel an infinite tenderness for you. I always will. My whole life.

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This might sound like a downer but I’m kind of a depressive… for me that means that sometimes it kind of hurts to be alive. Moments hurt sequentially. And when I’m bombarded with stimulation and information, I can always fill that need. Every time I feel like I’m getting bored or I’m not happy, I can do something quickly to fill that need. I think I confuse the issue and confuse the subject without quite understanding that the way I was feeling was deeper than just, ‘I’m bored right now.’ It had something to do with the fact that I’m deeply distressed that… life goes on. I don’t know how else to say it.

Paul Miller, after a year without the internet (x)

this is still the most accurate description of depression i’ve ever come across, like even better, or maybe just more modern, than The Bell Jar

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Meadham Kirchhoff Fall 2014 Backstage

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